Things I’ve learned about running

  1. I hate running.

That’s it. That’s pretty much it. I absolutely hate the physical activity that is called running and all measured distances on which one may compete in the sport called running and basically everything about running is abhorrent1 to me.

But, that said, I think this is a worthy experiment, and I will keep doing the thing called running at least as long as it takes me to get what I need for book #3. Which…could be a while.

There are actually two things I’ve found interesting about running. First, I think it has to be the most fundamental sport there is, right? I was running the other day and listening to The Odyssey and it was at that part where Odysseus is saying how he’s a shitty runner right now because he’s been on a boat for a while.2 He says any other sport he’ll bring the whoop-ass, how dare you impugn my honor guy-whose-name-I-forget. (This may or may not have happened this way, I actually can’t remember. There’s a ball dance too that I’m sure I’m picturing wrong.) And I just was thinking, this has to be like the first sport ever, right? If you don’t count beating the shit out of each other and killing animals. What else could it be? My other thought was that it could be lifting weights, but running is just a body moving through space. It doesn’t require anything else. That makes me think it’s probably running.

The second thing I find really interesting is that even though I’ll never win a race, any race, at any distance, the “active mind” in me still wants to puzzle out this thing I don’t enjoy and am not good at and will probably never do again once this project is done. And understanding unfamiliar things is something I’m actually quite skilled at, and proud of. Like, I’m not fast. But why am I not fast? It’s not a question of just “be faster.” Everything has a science to it, and a place to focus and engage in incremental change. Is it a longer stride, or more steps per minute, or what? The puzzle of anything, even if the puzzle is running, will always be what interests me most, and so anything can be interesting.

#dilettantelife #notanathlete #mylegsareeatingthemselves

  1. Love this word.
  2. Someday I’ll write a series called “Tara Paraphrases The Classics.” It’ll be a shittier Drunk History. We’ll call it “Drunk Homer.”